a rebuttal from Dougger.
Here at Hollywookiee, our readers come first. After all, if people didn’t read this site then what the hell would be the point? One time guest reviewer Dougger was deeply moved and overwhelmed by the comments his review of the film “Cedar Rapids” received and thought that readers might like him to pop in and respond. Enjoy.
Phil says: I don’t trust the opinions of this particular guest writer.
Dougger says: Hi Phil. If anyone wants Phil’s information, you know cell phone, home phone, work phone, home address, Facebook page then please email this site’s administrator.
Leesie says: who’s the new writer???
Dougger says: Hi Leesie! I have a computer, I like movies and happen to know the guy who runs this site.
Connie says: i agree with phil
Dougger says: Mussolini agreed with Hitler.
vanessa says: pretty good post who’s DOUGGER?
Dougger says: Thanks Vanessa, see my response to Leesie’s comment. Also, my favorite color is blue.
Kerry says: good flick and Anne Heche looked hot!!!
Dougger says: Yes, Anne Heche is a lovely looking lady indeed. Clearly you, Ellen Degeneres and I can appreciate fine things.
Fred says: cedar rapids wasnt that great.
Dougger says: Well Fred, opinions are like assholes, EVERYONE has one and they all smell. However, mine seems to smell better than yours…my opinion that is. Who am I kidding; I’m sure my asshole smells better than yours too.
Monica says: Spot on — I LOVED this movie
Dougger says: This comment is what we refer to in the biz of writing reviews for your friend’s website as “the tits.”
Mark says: great review!!! WRITE MORE LIKE THIS!
Dougger says: Thanks. OKAY!
ted! says: I liked this review too!!! post more!!!
Dougger says: Thank you much. See Above.
Stefan says: an astute review of an enjoyable movie. kudos!
Dougger says: KUDOS to you for using the word “astute.” We here at Hollywookiee often discuss over coffee in the break room how that word does not get enough usage in the current, popular vernacular.
anonymous says: DOUGGER sounds like a cool guy….sounds like.
Dougger says: Meh, he’s okay.
junebug says: this Dougger’s got moxie!
Dougger says: Junebug, I picture you hammering away on a Smith-Corona typewriter, cigarette clenched between your teeth and wearing a 1930’s Fedora with a tag on it that reads “press.” Moxie!
Alex P Rapin says: i want to b rape Phil
Dougger says: Alex, rape is not funny at all in any context. On the other hand, you can’t rape the willing.
Phil says: ^ ^ HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!
Dougger says: Phil, make sure Alex takes you to dinner and a movie first.
the ramones says: c’mon hollywookiee do a review a day!
Dougger says: The Ramones! Which Ramones? The members that are still alive or the ones that have fallen off the mortal coil? I would like to think Joey, Johnny and Dee Dee are huddled over a laptop in heaven reading my review. Gabba Gabba Hey!
coach Wallace says: dougger needs to get off his ass and do more reviews!
Dougger Says: Dougger needs to get on his ass and write more reviews because he has trouble typing whilst standing up.
fish says: never heard of cedar rapids.
Dougger says: Welp, now you have. Thanks for chiming in.
jason says: Hey can Dougger do more reviews, i like his? Style
Dougger says: You don’t love me, you just like my “Dougger-style.” P.S. Thanks, I’ll try.
sergio says: SPOILERS MUCH?!?!
Dougger says: Oh snap! I forgot to tell you that everyone dies at the end.
Manny says: Well i netflixed the movie based on this review and loved it so thanks!!!
Dougger says: You’re welcome, I’m glad you enjoyed it.
Taylor says: Oh my goodness! an incredible article dude.
Dougger says: Thank you very much.
marcus says: You could certainly see your enthusiasm in the work you write. The world hopes for even more passionate writers like you who aren’t afraid to say how they believe. Always go after your heart.
Dougger says: Thank you, that was the second nicest thing anyone has ever said to me. The first was “I want you inside me.”
BOB says: this Dogger was a one hit reporter apparently
Dougger says: Yeah, well Bobby ‘Boris’ Pickett & The Crypt-Kickers were a one hit wonder with “The Monster Mash” and that song kicks ass. So there.
wolvie says: the movie sucked, the review sucked, dougger sucks and so does this website
Dougger says: Very good, Wolvie! Short and to the point. Any luck on passing that G.E.D. test? How many tries do you get before they snap your number two pencil in half, hand you a shovel and tell you to start digging ditches?
penis of dougger says: mmmmm yeah.
Dougger says: Say man, it’s been a long time since middle school. How come you still “pop up” at inappropriate times?
Stan says: i want to take dougger behind the church by his house and get him pregnant
Dougger says: That was a lot funnier when Tracy Morgan said it on “30 Rock.”
matt says: do me right Dougger, do me right.
Dougger says: I’m guessing you liked the review.
warrant says: do it!
Dougger says: you do it!
zygor says: What’s the difference involving innocence and ignorance?
Dougger says: ?!?
Dougger says: Are you the same Junebug that commented earlier or are you the Junebug who tried to sell me a bootleg DVD of “Madea’s Big Happy Family” outside of the Panda Express on Crenshaw Boulevard?
Rosanne says: i have seen Dougger do some great stuff and I would like to think he would do more here.
Dougger says: Thank you, I’ll try to write more. Anything in particular you’d like me to review?
whatever says: you + a bag of dicks= this website
Dougger says: What kind of bag? Brown paper bag? Plastic bag? Environmentally Friendly Reusable Grocery Tote Bag? It would have been better if you were more descriptive. I would have said “a pillow case overflowing with dicks.” And what sort of dicks are we talking about here? I think it would have been much better if you wrote: you + a pillow case overflowing with dicks, of many different lengths and girths as well as varying ethnicities, some hard, some flaccid, but all washed and free of disease and irritation = this website
carina says: if dougger doesn’t write again then there is no God.
Dougger says: So, the existence of a divine deity seems to rest solely in my hands. I strongly feel that this type of power does not belong in my hands or any other mortal.
junebug says: MOXIE!!!!!
Dougger says: Yeah. Got it. Moxie. Thanks.
December 18, 2017
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